I have just read the most amazing thing ever.

So I have this roommate, who requested I not use any of her names (she has many).

She has a secret fetish--which is about to become a lot less secret with the post. Oops. Anyway, it isn't horrible or anything, unless you happen to share a house with her. Her fetish is really bad books. Horribly bad books. Books so bad you aren't really upset that you paid money for them, you just are kind of mystified that someone published them. Like witnessing a zombie claw it's way out of a wreck with half it's head missing and only one arm to it's credit--you just wonder how it keeps going.

So after hearing her going on about this horrible book, I grab it where she's currently reading and read a few pages. It's about this guy who's doing some chick in the dirt-button to preserve her virginity. There's a reason for this, but they haven't revealed it at this point. It's a source of super-omg-angst-ftw and all that shit.

Then I come across the following:

"Kimber screamed, her body spasming. Then, with a roar, Deke shoved into her one last time and came apart, exploding into a million pieces until he began soaring, light-headed. He saw white... and Kimber's flushed face, mouth open as she cried out in satisfaction."

This is the most amazing thing I have ever, ever read. This is something worthy of praise such as the Nobel prize for publications. This is--this is--this is the best thing ever.

All facetiousness aside, I seriously lolled hard at the above paragraph. I got this image of this poor woman screaming her heart out while a guy screamed a war-cry such as "FREEEEDOOOOOMMMMM!" gave one last thrust and literally exploded. It was fucking awesome.

The book is called Decadent, and that should be enough to track it down if you really want to. I can't be bothered to pry the book from The Roommate to look at the authors name.

-McK